Weddings these days are incorporating more and more touches of old vintage style. Lace detail, rustic frames, flowers in mason jars, outdoor weddings, or set in some old barn. There’s often mismatched furniture, and hand made touches. People decorate stations with ancient suitcases, doilies, bunting, lights and lanterns.
I love that the theme represents age: it shows the wedding is a picture of what the marriage will be like- a partnership that lasts a lifetime.
It shows the marriage will respect the finer details of life: that there will be care and acknowledgement of the small things as well as the big.
It shows that love is held even for the age old worn away things: the partners within the marriage will love well in to old age with even greater affection than one has for family heirlooms or well read books. And in this 21st Century culture of fast fast fast, the value portrayed at these weddings is that this marriage will stand through time. It values waiting, and slowly discovering more of the other partner, rather than having and knowing all now.
It shows the weight of appreciation for the person, for not just who they are now, but all they’ll become, and the hopeful expectation for the adventures they’ll share together.
It values the treasures of both families that are coming together to become one.
I had the honour of being involved in a wedding of my roommate from school this summer. And I hand made a giant guest book for the occasion. I didn’t want it to just be a book with hundreds of blank pages where a fraction of guests write “Congratulations”. I wanted it to be meaningful, for the guests to sow in to the marriage being made. Because like it takes a village to raise a child, it takes community to build a solid marriage.
How would you build a successful marriage? The depends on what you define as success. To me, success is knowing you’re loved, doing what you love, and serving those you love with your time. So a successful marriage, would include continuing to pursue and discover the other person, falling in love with them more everyday. Love requires sacrifice: that doesn’t mean you have to compromise on who you are, but it does mean you must love the other person how you love your own body. And honesty, always always honesty: in communication of expectation, and needs, and desires.